Happiness…..Is Not a Fish That You Can Catch

Happiness is, for me at least, listening to a band you have loved for a long while, the sun shining through the window and a wonderful feeling of peace. I haven’t felt this way for a while; so it is a very good thing. I should thank the band: Our Lady Peace and mention today’s blog post title is also one of their albums. If you don’t know them and you have a liking for alternative music please do seek them out!

I said in my last post that this one would be a goals/resolution post. To be honest though I am a little all over the place at the minute as I have so much going on in my life. Because of that I feel goals and resolutions are slightly redundant at this time.

I am just thinking about being happy, living life fully, loving with all my heart, becoming the best me I can ever be. Basically just living for today. Maybe that is a cop out; I don’t know and to be honest I don’t care. I don’t want to force myself down a road that isn’t right for me just because I feel like I should set goals for myself, surely that would be counterproductive. So for now, no goals. I am happier that way.

I have been struggling recently with confidence, a lack of, believe me I wish that sometimes I had it in abundance. I have a few really smart friends on FB who have such strong opinions about many of the same things I have strong opinions about. I however don’t feel confident enough to comment on 99% of the things they talk about. I get this nervous knot in my stomach, what happens if someone responds to something I say and I am unable to comment back? How foolish would I look for trying to have an opinion. So my self doubt sets in and I just don’t bother. I don’t like not bothering though, I feel that sometimes I have such important things to say. How on earth do I get over that mental hump though. It sucks. And yet here I am writing a blog, not that very many people know it exists but I do know someone somewhere out there is reading it occasionally and that doesn’t affect me at all. I don’t feel nervous or skittish about people reading my blog. Maybe it is because I don’t know who is reading this but when I take part in a conversation I know who it is and don’t want to appear stupid. Maybe one day I will just take the plunge and get my opinion out there.

In other news; the vegetarianism is going extremely well. I haven’t felt this good about my eating choices or my health for a long long time. I feel more in touch with everything and it is amazing, who knew food could be so powerful!? I am really happy to be on this journey and have the ability to share it with you.

I hope everybody is healthy and happy. Until next time, take care xx

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